Chell is absolutely livid right now. I’m not sure if its because I locked her out for several hours, or if its because Gabe said the door is coming out of her paycheck since technically she’s the one that broke it in half with a tire-iron.
None of this woulda’ happened if she’s just hunted down and killed that maniac first like I suggested! Instead I’m sleeping on the couch for the rest of the month. But she’ll be sorry when she wakes up to find me gutted and that lunatic trying to replace me! Of course that won’t happen because I have a new idea.
This one’s much better too. My other flatmate Gabe collects knives, you see. A lot of knives. He even takes his favorites ones to bed! Well unlike a certain other someone, he believes me about the danger we’re in. So if that madman tries to kill me, I’ve got permission to use Gabe’s knives in self-defense. I even took a picture of him and the knives so he doesn’t think I’m bluffing.
Beware Identity Thief! HE IS (and be association myself as well) ARMED!